I haven’t fully wakened up from the Christmas/end of year slumber. It might take me another week or so to come round.
We were lucky enough to get away to Donegal last week for a couple of days to try and shake off the cobwebs, and reset for the new year. Hailstones, strong winds, freezing temperatures, plenty of rain and some welcome sunshine helped us along.
When I got home I had a serious chat with myself about my stubbornness around my insistence each year on taking down the Christmas decorations on 6th January – Nollaig na mBan. Women’s Christmas, is making a comeback, which is welcome, but the strong irony remains that it is mostly down to the women of the house to get Christmas done, then de-Christmas the house in preparation for the new year.
I refused to tidy the decorations away on the 6th, procrastinated and boxed everything up on Tuesday morning. While I was procrastinating, I found myself knee deep in the reaction to Demi Moore’s Golden Globe Speech.
Demi won the best actress award for her role in The Substance, which I haven’t seen yet, but I hear that it is great. This was Moore’s first time to win anything in her 45 years in the film industry. She clearly didn’t expect to win the award, and that made her acceptance speech all the more extraordinary.
She was razor sharp and to the point. She said that his award was something she wasn’t allowed to have, because of a comment someone made to her 30 years ago about being a ‘popcorn actress’. Demi bought in to this comment, believed it and by her own admission, these words corroded her over time. She had thought a few years ago that this was it, she had done what she was supposed to do, but then at a very low point, came the script for The Substance, the role she for which she had just won a Golden Globe.
Read more: Demi Moore’s daughters react to actress’s first Golden Globes win
She thanked the people who believed in her when she didn’t believe in herself. Her words really landed because they were real, they were her lived experience. You don’t have to be a film star for her words to resonate.
The speech has been heralded as a masterclass on imposter syndrome, and also as a reminder to all women that we don’t have to have to achieve everything in life by the age of 30. I think that the reason why Demi’s speech will be referred to again and again for years to come is that she articulated a truth that women over 40 carry, that we often let self doubt hold us back.
Read more: Alec Baldwin praises Demi Moore’s ‘bravery’ after Golden Globes win
Demi Moore’s speech will be referred to again and again for years to come because she articulated a truth that women over 40 carry, that we often let self doubt hold us back
How many of us have latched on to something that was said to us in a particular way, and let it fester and almost dictate who we were for a while? Often comments can be made innocently, with good intentions, but that is not how they land with us, and if we latch on to the sentiment, they can become our inner voice and define what we are capable of – or not as the case may be.
It is much easier said than done, but we just can’t let the words, thoughts, opinions of others define us. We are defined by how we show up. It is therefore important to have people around you us who really see us – those people who believe in us when we don’t believe in ourselves – partners, friends, mentors; our ‘village’ matters.
For me, the most empowering part of this is that she made this speech aged 62. She looks incredible – and I was sad to see that her appearance was the subject of many bitter comments online.
The perception of this woman for many is that she has it all – whatever that means. Success doesn’t silence self doubt or imposter syndrome,. We are conditioned to believe that we can be too old to do certain things in life, but it is never too late to embrace your potential. This is particularly difficult for women to take on and fully realise.
We owe it to ourselves to try, to own our own timeline and consign the inner critic to history.
Demi Moore’s epic speech came at a great time. We woke up to her reminder of our power and potential on Nollaig na mBan, a celebration of everything that women contribute to the home and to society.
