Hi-de-hi to globe-trotters and staycationers alike, you are all welcome to the Bluffer’s Guide to Irish.
The Bluffer has just booked his first holiday of 2025.
Now, if you’re in a conversation with, say your gruagaire - hairdresser, the might ask “bhfuil tú ag dul ar saoire i mbliana?” - Are you going on holidays this year? and the answers can be many.
Lá anseo is ansiúd - a day here and there if the family budget rules out a fortnight in the Seychelles.
Families might say tá carbhán againn i mBun Abhann Dalla - we have a caravan in Cushendall and indeed, the Bluffer’s earliest memories are of long, hot sunny days in nearby Bun na hAbhna - Waterfoot, a place he still loves.
But now the Bluffer is the age his parents were back then and the whole world of going on holidays has changed.
Tá mé ag dul ar saoire means I am going on holidays but there are all kinds of vacations available nowadays that the choice is well-now infinite.
You can go to Turkey to get new teeth, a must-have if you want to appear on “reality” TV.
However, even though some of us look mar a bheadh bó mhothais ann - like a beached whale, a seaside holiday is what most or us crave, given an cineál aeráide - the type of climate we suffer from here.
So the Bluffer is off to Gran Canaria at the end of February a anáil a tharraingt - to recharge his batteries.
However, other people are into different kinds of holiday experiences.
Some would like to go on a safari which has never been to the Bluffer’s taste.
He isn’t old enough to go on a cruise aimed at those of a certain age where the air is laden with Opium (the perfume, not the drug) Brylcreem and halitosis.
He’s not old enough for cruises but not young enough to go clubbing in Ibiza; skiing in the Alps; paragliding off a cliff in Chile or doing any kind of adventure holiday.
As much as he loves Mother Nature, ecotourism tourism is not his thing although a holiday involving massages and spas is very much to his liking.
Now the Bluffer is not judgemental and he will not look down on you if your needs are simple – like his are – and all you require apart from the sun is a linn snámha - a swimming pool, bia den scoth - great food and pints of San Miguel for €3.
However, the Bluffer has recently been to hotels where the siamsaíocht - entertainment has been first class and he has spend evenings boogying to bannaí ómóis - tribute bands so good you would swear you were in the Cavern in Liverpool and the real John, Paul, George and Ringo belting out I Wanna Hold Your Hand or you were on the set of Top of the Pops watching Barry, Maurice and Robin Gibb harmonise to Too Much Heaven or strutting their stuff to Jive Talkin’.
So, it’s different strokes for different folks.
Covid has brought abut a new sense of family and multi-generational holidays seem to be coming back into fashion again.
In the meantime, Playa del Ingles, pull me that €3 pint, por favor!
Cúpla Focal
gruagaire (grooagara) - hairdresser
bhfuil tú ag dul ar saoire i mbliana? (wil too eg gul er seera i mleeana) - Are you going on holidays this year?
Lá anseo is ansiúd (laa anshaw is anshood) - a day here and there
tá carbhán againn i mBun Abhann Dalla (taa caravaan ageen i mun owen daala) - we have a caravan in Cushendall
Bun na hAbhna (bun ha howna) - Waterfoot
Tá mé ag dul ar saoire (taa may eg gul er seera) - I am going on holidays
mar a bheadh bó mhothais ann (mar a vayoo baw wohish un) - like a beached whale
an cineál aeráide (un kinyal ayraadge) - the type of climate
a anáil a tharraingt (anaal a harringtch) - to recharge his batteries
linn snámha (lin snaowa) - a swimming pool
bia den scoth (beea den scoyh) - great food
siamsaíocht (sheeamseeakht) - entertainment
bannaí ómóis (banee omosh) - tribute bands
